She Wants Me Dead

She Wants Me Dead Review

This is one killer kitty

A.J. Maciejewski

Reviewed by playing a PlayStation 4 on

ESRB Teen rating

After all these years of taking goofy pictures of cats, one furball finally had enough. This 2D platformer has you run for your life from your feline pal but is it the cat's pajamas or is it more suited for the litter box?

She Wants Me Dead screenshot 1
I'm surprised my cat set up all these elaborate traps all by herself

She Wants Me Dead is played by running and jumping on the rooftops of a city while avoiding hazards. Contrary to what you may assume, it's not an endless runner because you can move freely with the only exception being when fire is chasing you. It's incredibly easy to pick up and play with no instruction as anyone who has ever played a video game before will understand how to play almost instantly. All you do is run left and right and jump. Where the challenge emerges is in the stage hazards. You'll come across spikes, saws, springboards, electric currents, axes, and disappearing platforms. Wait, I thought this game was about a cat. Anyway, it gets extremely tough to time your jumps so thankfully the controls are as basic as they are. Although the level of challenge is high enough to be rewarding, the simplistic bare-bones gameplay holds She Wants Me Dead back from having lasting appeal.

Visually, everything appears as if it's your average stylistic monochrome indie game and nothing ever deviates much from that formula. However, the presentation shines in the audio department. She Wants Me Dead is a song by Swedish duo Cazzette and this game is built around it. This seems strange at first but once you play for a while, you'll realise that it's actually quite an innovative concept. Basically, the stages move to the beat of the song so you can time your jumps and runs by using your ears as well as your eyes. It's fantastic to watch an array of hazards move synchronously as you carefully plan how to navigate past them. Another nifty feature is that the music changes every time you die. It's still the same song but you'll hear various instruments stripped out whenever you bite the dust. All of this being said, there's still only one song so it's bound to get on your nerves after a while.

She Wants Me Dead screenshot 2
I don't know whether to be scared of the flames or the hissing cat more

She Wants Me Dead only contains ten stages. Each one of them can potentially be completed in under a minute so if you're a gaming ninja then you could theoretically beat this game in the time it takes to microwave a baked potato. That being said, average gamers will need many attempts but I'm sure most folks could beat it in well under an hour. To add some replay value, you acquire a gold frame whenever you complete a stage unscathed but collecting all ten will be a rather taxing endeavor. There are also a couple of challenges that have you play through the whole campaign in one sitting. Besides that, there's really nothing to do.

As you beat stages, you unlock a bunch of items that change how your dude and various objects look. You purchase these with earned coins and although they don't change the gameplay, they're fun to play with. Running around with an audio tape for a head while wearing a straitjacket, boxing gloves, and a tutu and having a rainbow follow you wherever you go is great fun no matter where you come from. Turning checkpoints into portals and tombstones into flowerbeds is quite silly as well. Heck, you can even try to play the game while entirely invisible. Maybe you'll even get a trophy for doing that...

She Wants Me Dead screenshot 3
Being stuck between moving saws is no way to spend a Saturday night

She Wants Me Dead is an enjoyable and simple little platformer but the severe lack of content doesn't make it easy to recommend. If the developers included a handful of songs and fifty or so stages then it would be a worthwhile download but as it stands, you'll be better off playing with a psychotic kitty in real life.

  • + Easy-to-learn yet challenging gameplay
  • + Awesome use of music that changes when you die and has stages move to the beat
  • + Superficial extras are fun to tinker with
  • - Gameplay is too simple to have longevity
  • - Although it's pretty cool, the only included song gets quite repetitive
  • - Merely consists of ten very short stages
5.8 out of 10
Gameplay video for She Wants Me Dead 1:17

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